These Are The Nights That Make it All Worth It

Hey y’all! So last night I went to a music festival called LOVELOUD and it was AMAZING. The music was so good, but it came with an even more important message.

Utah has one of the highest suicide rates in the country, at 60% higher than the national average. It’s the leading cause of death from ages 10-17. It makes me sick just typing it out. However it’s not even the number that makes me sick, even 1 is too much.

When it comes to suicide, any is too many.

Imagine Dragons performed at the festival and the leader singer had grown up in Utah himself. He talked a bit about how we knew what it was like to grow up here and how the pressure can be really difficult particularly because of religion, etc. But his main point was that we have to love each other and learn that the amount of worth you have is infinite no matter who you are, what you believe, how you identify, what you look like, etc. And that hit me really hard for some reason, I’ve been taught forms of that my entire life and I’ve been passionate about suicide prevention for years but last night was another reminder to me of how important it is.

Life is HARD. Life is SAD. Life is SCARY.  But life is SO GOOD. And life is SO WORTH IT.

I’ve been dealt my fair share of bad days, but standing in that crowd yesterday with thousands of other people screaming out lyrics was one of those nights that made every bad day this year worth it. I went to the concert with some really good family friends who I consider to be my 2nd mom and little brother along with her boyfriend and his kids and let me tell you I never want to miss out on all those smiles and craziness.  My cousins and other brother were there too and I don’t think I’ll ever get sick of hearing the laughter I grew up listening to.

I hope you know that I’m crying happy tears just writing this because there have been days where I have been so done with fighting to live. Days where I was so sick and in so  much pain. Days where I felt like my own parents couldn’t stand to be around me and I was so alone because no one else understood. And there will still be those days.

But as cheesy as it sounds I would take it every day because no matter how bad it gets, it can always get better. And I am so extremely grateful for the life I have and the people around me. This blog helped me through many things and y’all mean the world to me. And I know that I am so so lucky to have the amazing family, boyfriend, and best friends that I do because not everyone does.

However, if you think that no one cares about you, I do. No matter what, 100% of the time I care about how you are and that you’re here even if we haven’t met or talked before. You are of the utmost importance I promise you.

So let’s just all love a little more, and appreciate the good days that come around. Live unapologetically.

Love y’all! – Aspen