Blogmas Day 9: Music!

In honor of my orchestra concert this evening I thought that’d I do a list of my favorite Christmas songs/arrangements  for the 9th day of Blogmas.

In no particular order:

– Mr. Grinch from The Grinch Who Stole Christmas

-Where are You Christmas from The Grinch Who Stole Christmas

-Carol of The Bells by Tran-Siberian Orchestra

– I’m Coming Home For Christmas covered by Michael Buble

– Mary Did You Know by various artists

-Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas by Frank Sinatra

– Blue Christmas by Elvis Presley

– God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen by various artists

-Do You See What I See by various artists

– Silent Night by various artists

Hope you liked it! What Christmas songs so ya’ll like?

Love ya’ll and Merry Christmas Eve^15

Blogmas Day 7: Christmas Wishlist

Okay I’m actually writing this on Sunday even though you’ll be reading this on Monday. I’m not exactly sure if I’ll have time to write tomorrow so I’m doing it today…..

This is my Christmas Wishlist for this year! Although most of these I’ve already picked out/bought or whatever…

  • ASU trip: For debate we’re taking a week long trip to Arizona State University for a tournament and this counts as part of my Christmas
  • Heated Blanket: AAggh I can’t wait to use this thing!!
  • Clothes: I got some boots and a sweater already, and I think we’re going shopping today. I really need clothes for the tournament…
  • Fuzzy robe: It’s sooo soft and grey!
  • Twin necklace: My twin (not biological) and I are getting necklaces for each other
  • Paint, carpet, etc: To finish my secret room!

Well this is all I really know of that I want for Christmas. What’re ya’ll asking for?

Love ya’ll and Merry Christmas Eve^18- Aspen from the past XD

Blogmas Day 5&6:Christmas in My Religion

SO SO SO SO sorry for missing Blogmas yesterday, but my family went out Christmas shopping last night and watched a movie really late so yeah…

WARNING: These are my own beliefs, and in no way do I mean to offend anyone.



First off, I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. We believe that Christ’s true birthday is April 6th, but that the wise men reached Christ on Christmas. We still celebrate the life of Christ at this time, just as most people.

There isn’t really anything different per say that we do. We still use Santa Claus and give out presents and everything else that has to do with Christmas normally. One really cool thing we do is lighting up temple square.

Temple square is the area and buildings around our temple in Salt Lake City, which is sort of the “capital” of our church. I’ll be going to see them this year on Wednesday with my young men and young women’s groups as a church activity.

Here are some pictures of what temple square looks like during the holidays:








Sorry if this post was kind of confusing, if you have any questions just comment below. I’m happy to help! I would also like to add that there are many, many other temples around the world, this one is just in the area where “Mormons” predominantly live.

Love ya’ll and Merry Christmas Eve^19

Blogmas Day 4; Storytime

Hey ya’ll. My cousins just came over, including the baby and it was awesome. My parents were gone so I got to spend with them alone. We read some Christmas stories, ate dinner, and played Just Dance for awhile. Oh yeah, and I found out the baby is a candy junkie. She was even hauling around a giant box of candy XD.

Anyways, back to day four of blogmas! I’ve had a ton of amazing Christmases (Is that a word?…), but I decided to write about one in particular.

When I was 11 my family of four and our VERY good family friends Amy and David who have one little boy Summit who was at that time 6 years old. They’re from Wisconsin so we piled all 7 of us into an SUV with all of our presents and winter gear and drove 24 hours.

Now there is something you should know about my brothers (One isn’t biological, but he counts). they love licorice and cheetos, and they are VERY messy. The car roof is still stained orange in the back. On the drive I remember going through Iowa past a slaughterhouse and it smelt so bad and I had to pee really bad too. It was terrible.

Once we finally made it to Wisconsin we stayed at our David’s parents house for a few days. On Christmas day, we got up, opened presents and our parents left to Green Bay for the Packers vs. Bears game. I got left behind with the boys and grandparents, and miraculously my “brothers” cousin Hayle who is my age. We all drove to the Kalahari, which is the world’s largest indoor water park.

It has a massive water park (obviously), a go kart track, laser tag, a ropes course, full on restaurants, and more. The water park was AWESOME and the day after the game our parents joined us. While swimming one day there was this creepy life guard who kept following Hayle and I around. Now remember he was about 19 and we were 11. It got to the point that Amy had to go tell him how old we were and to stop following us.

Our whole group took up all the go karts so we always had our own private little races which was really cool. One day while we were walking around, they had baby tiger cubs in the front area. All of the kids got to go pet it and take pictures, and since I was on the end I got to feed it a bottle. It was soooo cool.

After the water park we were going to go to the Mall of America, but there had been a shooting that day so we decided to drive down to Chicago. My family is Bears fans so we went and got a tour of Soldier Field, even though my parents had already been to a game. We also went down to the pier and got the best pizza I’ve ever eaten.


All in all, I LOVE traveling way more than I like normal Christmas presents, I feel like you remember the experiences so much more. Where have ya’ll traveled for the holidays? This year I went to Arizona for Thanksgiving and got a tour of the Phoenix Cardinals stadium and got to ride a camel!

Love ya’ll and Merry Christmas Eve^20

Explaining, Ranting and Thanking.

Hey ya’ll.

So these past few weeks have been under normal circumstances, pretty good. The deadline for math homework got pushed back a week, I get to spend time with my cousins tonight (Eeek I can’t wait to see them!!), and my friends have been absolutely AMAZING, you have no idea.

First off, explaining. Well for those of you who don’t know, I have some major heart problems that don’t really have any solution. As I’m writing this, my mom is making another doctor’s appointment for me. We don’t know exactly how long I have or how deadly/ quick it all could be. All I know is that it hurts like complete and utter hell. I’ve been stabbed before, so when I say that it feels like I’m beings stabbed in my heart and back, I really mean it. My arms are constantly aching and my hands will lose feeling quite a bit. I also have a hard time standing without getting really dizzy, and breathing has been my worst enemy.

Another thing is that I have a swollen lymph node that may be cancerous. The enlarged one in my neck/shoulder is exactly how my dad’s cancer showed up. And I’ve had a few symptoms so that’s just fantastic.

Now ranting, and an apology in advance….. Guys I’m getting so sick of it, sometimes I honestly think it would just be better to die. Not that I would ever make a move to harm myself or end my own life, but if it was happening it would solve a lot of problems. But there’s also the other side of me that doesn’t want to die. I don’t want to miss out on everything and put everyone I love through that. But it hurts, god it hurts so bad. Today during orchestra I couldn’t even play, I just sat in the back trying so hard not to cry every time I breathed. My friend, Charles hurt his wrist so he was back there with me trying to make me feel better. And honestly, hugs and talking about Jensen Ackles very fine butt do help XD.

Uggghhhh I just wish there was a way for it to go away for awhile, that there was a way  I could stop breathing for more than a few seconds. But there isn’t so I’m sitting here helpless and dying. Literally. Sometimes I think I’m funny….. I’m halfway convinced that I have little pain demons following me around and stabbing me in the back. Charles and I were trying to find some demon spray, but that obviously didn’t work too well.

AAAAAAAHHHHHHhhh that’s exactly what I want to do, just scream forever even though it hurts really bad to. When the people who are supposed to help you are the ones saying that they can’t its terrifying. The words, “We don’t know. We can’t help” plastered in my brain, playing over and over again, but they won’t go away. I couldn’t claw them out if I tried. And so I cry, in pain and misery and self loathing. Why do I let myself be so weak in a time where all I need to be is strong?


And finally, thanking. This is rough, not only for me, but everyone around me. And I realize that. I appreciate everyone so much, all of you on this website who have been so helpful. Liv, for your inspiring words and Elm for your constant support, Sunny for your emotion and caring, and everyone else for EVERYTHING. I love you all so so much.

And my family, my aunts and cousins who sent me countless, “how are you feeling? We love you! ” messages and phone calls. My mom who takes me to all the doctors appointments and tries so hard to be strong, my dad who always makes sure I’m doing alright and that I know he loves me, and my little brother for his jokes and hugs and I love you’s.

And my friends, for your patience and listening to my painful ranting and dealing with my slow walking and using you as a pillow in Spanish class when needed. For talking me through everything and letting me know you’ve got my best interest in mind, for just being there. For Bex’s hugs and jokes, Lauren’s smiles and “I understands”, for Charles constant support and “No need to thank me’s” and Ryann’s caring notions and “I love you’s”. Thank you for sitting and crying with me and the countless hugs that make me feel safe. If you’re reading this I love ya’ll so much.

I would apologize for this, but I think it’s good for ya’ll to get a good perspective on everything.

As always, love ya’ll


Lessons Learned: Just Stand Up

I spent this past weekend camping up at one of my favorite places, Bear Lake. Bear Lake has been a tradition in my family since I was born, and it’s even where we met our best friends. They are currently building a cabin there so my family  decided to join them for a weekend at the lake.

One of my favorite things to do at the lake is boating. I love tubing, and especially wakeboarding, but this time they had something new for us to try: surfing. Granted, there aren’t natural waves large enough to go surfing so we had to create our own and surf behind the boat. Unlike wakeboarding, your feet don’t have shoes to slide into they have to sit on the board, and instead of holding a rope with a bar you  get a rope with knots so that you can surf without the rope.

When I got out onto the lake with the board under my feet and the rope in my hands, I kept repeating what they had told me: just stand up. So when I yelled, “Ready!” and the boat started going I flew backwards and swallowed what felt like gallons of the lake. I was choking on freezing water trying to swim towards the board that was now floating away.

Once I could breathe, I was adamant on trying again. This time I finally got up on the board, but in seconds I had leaned backwards and splashed into the lake once again. This happened a few times, each crash bringing along another bit of advice. Hold onto the rope more, pull yourself up, try to balance, don’t lean back, etc.

I then found myself trying to follow each tip, completely forgetting the first thing I was told: just stand up. When the boat started I gripped the rope, holding on for dear life, and flew. The board was long gone behind me as I gripped the rope and flew through the air until I realized that I needed to let go. My fingers slipped from the thick rope slamming into the lake moments before the rest of my belly-flopped.

While swimming towards the boat, I found myself unable to move my knees. Somehow smashing into the water had hurt them, even if I had been doing it all morning. So I took a break from surfing, and sat in the boat joking around with my brother about how I looked like Tarzan.

The next day my knees felt better so I decided to try again, but each time I tried I found myself doing the exact thing I had done the day before and still unable to get up. By the time I recognized what I was doing wrong, my knees and hands hurt too much to try again.

On the way home I was thinking about how long it was taking me to learn how to surf, even when  it took me two tries to wakeboard, and surfing was supposedly easier. The difference with wakeboarding was that I didn’t expect anything of myself. I had never tried anything of that sort before, and had no expectations of what I would or wouldn’t be able to do. But with surfing, I expected myself to catch on easily and surf as well as I could wakeboard. I was stressing myself out over trying to do every single thing perfect when the only thing I really had to do was just stand up.

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